The Bikini Salesman

THE BIKINI SALESMAN

PREMISE
(Premise #1: A good excuse to show pretty girls modeling bikinis. Jimmy is a Bikini Salesman in a bikini store. )

(Premise #2: Introduce Sody and set up budding romance. Leave audience hoping that Jimmy and Sody will get together later on.

Jimmy likes Sody, but doesn’t know if Sody likes him. He feels inadequate. Sody has the same feelings toward Jimmy.

Shows developing budding romance/ Leaves doubt as to whether or not they like each other.
The bikini store has display racks, mannequins, dressing rooms display cases, etc..
Sody is a customer—it is Jimmy and Sody’s first meeting.)




SET-UP
Sody wants to buy a new bikini and Jimmy is a bikini salesman. They meet for the first time.

OPENING

SODY CHECKS OUT BIKINIS

“Are you open for business?” asks Sody as she enters the store.
Sody is browsing through racks
Sody holds up various suits, can’t decide, drops them. She obviously is in need of help.

JIMMY IS CLERK

Jimmy’s head pops up from behind counter.
BODY
Sody tries on bikinis and Jimmy helps her. They get to know and like one another—a mutual crush in the making. Both are too naive and scared to voice their feelings about one another.

SODY MODELS BIKINI #1

Sody holds a bikini up: “What do you think?”
Jimmy frowns. The bikini is no good for her. He offers one that’s not so skimpy and sexy.
She puts it on, then steps out of the dressing room to model it.
Jimmy’s crotch inverts.

WEIRD BIKINIS

Weird shaped bikinis hang from strings on hangers
Band-Aids.
Price tags hide suit.

BALL OF YARN BIKINI

Ball of yarn suit.

WINTER RACK

Walks past the winter rack with fur ear muff bikinis
Snow capped mountain peak tops Skiers riding the slopes.

DRESSING ROOM

UNDERWEAR RULE

Sody takes the bikinis she’s selected into the dressing room.
She undresses, dropping her clothes to the floor.
Jimmy looks up to a sign and makes a startled noise.
Sody asks Jimmy if anything is wrong.
Jimmy points to the sign.
Sign: “For sanitary reason we politely request you wear under garments at all times while trying on swim wear.”
Sody says she’s not wearing underwear.
Jimmy pees himself.

JIMMY LOANS UNDERWEAR
He gives her his underwear.

PETER LORRE LADY

He sees her pants sliding down off her legs. Then he notices a dirty old man ( Peter Lorre look alike) in the corner of the store leering at the dressing room.

JIMMY HANDS OVER BIKINIS

Jimmy keeps handing bikinis over the dressing room door.
He blushes as he sees her naked arms and shoulders.
He shields his eyes and with dainty fingers hands her a bikini.

SODY MODELS BIKINI #2,3,4,5

She models 4 bikinis. “What do you think?”
She looks beautiful in each.
“Is there something wrong with these mirrors? Why do they always make you look fatter?”

JIMMY MODELS BIKINI

“Would you try this one on?” Sody asks Jimmy. “I need to see it on someone else to be absolutely certain it’s the right one for me.”
Jimmy models one down a runway.
High fashion gags.

SUNFLOWER BIKINI
Sody asks what the latest summer fashion is.
Jimmy offers their special summer suit
Sody tries on a bikini made from three sunflower blossoms. They are held together by strips of sod.
Sody: “This one’s too moist.”

MEAT BIKINI

Sody wears a meat bikini.
“Do I look fat? This one makes me look fat, doesn’t it?”

MIX-N-MATCH BIKINIS

A mix and match racks - one is for the left breast one for the right, a third rack for bottoms.

JIMMY HELPS DRESS SODY

She asks Jimmy to help fasten a string bikini, “ Could you come in here and help me fasten this top?”

JIMMY TIES BIKINI

End up in changing room together caught up in bikini top
Jimmy can’t quite get the fastenings together. He pulls harder and harder.
The top snaps and flies around both of them.
They both become snared in the top.

SUN TAN LOTION

Sody: “I can’t really tell if it’s right for the beach. I need to see myself with sun tan lotion on.”
Sody hands Jimmy bottle of lotion and turns around. “Would you do me back there?”
Jimmy squirts the entire contents of the bottle into the air but he doesn’t care.
Jimmy drools onto Sody’s back.
Sody giggles, “Oooh! Sends shivers down my spine!”
Jimmy rubs his drool into her skin.

PRICE TAG BIKINI

Jimmy keeps showing suits so small that the price tag appears to get larger and larger until finally just a tag is visible.
The smaller the suit the bigger the price tag.
Sody takes hanger with 3 price tags hanging off it and comes out of dressing room wearing them.
Price tag bikini is $100.
Sody is tormented. $100. is her entire baby-sitting earnings, but she’s got to look good at the beach.
Sody gets the price tag bikini.

END

Sody buys a bikini and leaves. A perfect magical moment, we should yearn for Jimmy and Sody to get together again.

SODY BUYS BIKINI

Sody asks if she can wear the bikini home.
Jimmy nods yes.
He puts her old clothes in a shoe box and hands it to her.
He rings up the bill on the cash register.

SODY LOVES BIKINI

Centerfold of Sody wearing the bikini. She looks lovely. Her skin glistens.
Sody is thrilled.
She hugs Jimmy.

SODY HAS A BOYFRIEND

With a look of concern Sody looks at herself in the mirror . “Maybe my boyfriend will finally notice me.”
Jimmy is crushed; he looks to the ground.
Sody’s hand cups Jimmy’s cheek. She looks him straight in the eye and says, “I wish I had a boyfriend like you Jimmy! You’re so nice to me!”
Sody skips away waving good-bye. “See you at the beach!” she says.